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pandamac 'EmBears
Northern New York State
Posts: 917
Website

My daughter sent this to me, thought I would share it with all of my pet-loving friends here.

A Dog's Diary

7am - Oh boy! A Walk! My favorite!
8am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
3pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite!
7pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!
8pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!
11pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!

A Cat's Diary

Day 183 of my captivity. My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture. Tomorrow I  may eat another house plant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded. Maybe I should try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little kitty cat I was. This is not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing something called "allergies" Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives and flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit.

The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant. He speaks with them regularly, and I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait.

It's only a matter of time.

Shari Nova Scotia,Canada
Posts: 1,712

bear_grin   bear_grin   bear_grin   bear_grin   :crackup:   :crackup:   :crackup:

Jennskains Posts: 2,203

:crackup: Ellen is there a way I could send that to my Mom?  She needs a laughh. also can someone expl;ain how to forward mail to TT? I got a funny the other day and thought you guys might enjoy!

pandamac 'EmBears
Northern New York State
Posts: 917
Website

What I did was to highlight the whole email, copy and paste.....and it worked for me (this time at least!)

pandamac

Bonnie Mountain Dreamer Bears
wooly woods of Missouri, USA
Posts: 1,538

:crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:

I love this, too funny!  Thanks for the laugh!

edie Bears by Edie
Southern Alberta
Posts: 2,068

That is so funny! I am going to send it to my sister who just dotes on her cats - she'll get a kick out of it, I'm sure!

Stellajella Wien
Posts: 1,399

Ellen,  how did you get the diaries of my cat & dogs?  bear_grin

Just perfectly shows them....

Gaby bear_flower

Eileen Baird'sBears
Toronto
Posts: 3,873

:crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:

Purrrrfect!

:crackup:  :crackup:  :crackup:

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