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Pumpkin & Pickle Bears
East Sussex
Posts: 2,047

Pumpkin & Pickle Bears Apr 17, 2007

This was an email my other half sent me....we're getting married in August so he just said 'There's hope for me yet!'

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's
> >Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks
> >didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got
> >home from
>
> >the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something
>wrong.
> >
> >Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he
> >sees
>
> >is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table.
> >And, next to them, a single red rose! !
> >Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and
>pressed.
> >He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order,
> >spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.
> >
> >He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring
> >back at ! him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging
> >on
>
> >the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and
> >a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick:
> >
> >"Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to
> >make you your favourite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love,
>Jillian"
> >
> >He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast,
> >steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the

> >table, eating. Jack asks, "Son... what happened last night?"
> >
> >"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You
> >fell
>
> >over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the
> >hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.
> >
> >Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect
> >order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table
> >waiting for me??"
> >
> >His son replies, "Oh THAT!... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and
> >when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me
> >alone, I'm married!!"
> >
> >Broken Coffee Table $239.99
> >Hot Breakfast $4.20
> >Two Aspirins $.38
> >Saying the right thing, at the right time .. . PRICELESS