Banner Sponsors
For artists and collectors sponsored by Intercal...your mohair supplier and Johnna's Mohair Store
I got this email today and thought i would share it will all of you.
Hugs
Vicki
You Think English is Easy
Can you read these right the first time?
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the
bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row .
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong
to wind the sail.
18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend.
Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in amburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France.
Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If
teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which
your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all that is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
PS. - Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick"
Past Time Bears
Bearly Kidz Bears:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
DoodlebearsOh this crazy country, what have we done to the world with our language...makes for great reading though!
:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
Hugs Jane, a crazy speaking English woman. 
Country BearsNo wonder English is hard to learn, I still am!! :crackup: :crackup:
BrisbaneYes, English is a weird language. My german friend, whose english is actually pretty good, was always coming up with weird words. He was trying to use the rules to make up words. Unfortunately there are too many expections to the rules! I was forever correcting him, luckily he was good natured about it. :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
Edit: mind you he would show me up with some strange word occasionally, something that is technically correct but is rarely used. 
Posts: 3,540And if it wasn't weird enough, the Americans took 'english' and made it their own 
I'm STILL learning, and when I visited the UK we had hilarious mixups of phrases....even pronunciations that threw both parties for a loop :crackup:
Bears by JodiAmazing !!!!
Chaska, MinnesotaYes we have a quirky language...no doubt about that. I love the examples.....:crackup: :crackup:
